It's probably not the answer you want to hear, but no sensible options exist for running a RMH inside of a tightly sealed building.
At least, that's the case if you are talking about the stereotypical J-tube RMH that is all-the-rage on permies.com and other similar places.
The frequent feeding required by a RMH means that if you plumb in an external air inlet, then every time you unseal the feed tube you will end up with smoke in the room. With 'normal' wood heaters, you only feed them infrequently, and well into the coal phase, so negligible smoking occurs. With a RMH you are always burning fresh wood and producing smoke at the bottom of the feed tube. This battle can't be won without modifying the RMH.
If you are able and willing to experiment and mod the basic J-tube design, then you could run your external air inlet into the bottom or side of the feeder tube and install a butterfly valve in it. Every time you wanted to feed the RMH you would have to simultaneously constrict flow in the external air pipe using the valve, whilst unsealing the top of the feeder tube. Good luck with that. It's time consuming and never quite works. End result: Smoke in the room.
In ideal circumstances (no high or low pressure zones outside, no wind) you could eventually get it dialled-in, but we don't live on a world where those sorts of conditions exist.
The reality is that tight sealing / heat recovery ventilators is a divergent path that embraces active and artificial systems. You're basically creating a house that needs an artificial lung for the rest of its existence when you tightly seal a house. That choice inevitably makes other solutions impractical or impossible to implement, because those solutions only work in moderately sealed thermal envelopes.
When I designed my house recently I faced the same issues. I have an infinite supply of free wood, and a limited capacity to generate electricity during winter. I went with a wood heater / outdoor air combo and didn't push for tight sealing. If I was in a colder climate and/or didn't have a really good passive solar design, then I would have gone RMH / indoor air instead of the wood heater.
I like trees, I like wood heat, I don't like the constant drone of HRVs, I don't have much in the way of surplus solar in winter to run pumps continuously, and I like the idea of a house that can breathe without mechanical assistance. I didn't tightly seal the house, and I have no regrets about that choice.
If you insist on tightly sealing your house, and insist on installing a RMH, then the simplest solution is to crack open a window whilst using the RMH. Not really sensible, but it would work.
Another approach, which reduces the smoking issue, but does not eliminate it, is with something like the design shown at: http://www.naturalhomes.org/permahome/rocket-mass-heater-basics.htm. Focus on the image. See how they have added a manifold/hood over the feeder and inject external air through that? The problem with that approach is that when wind blows against the side of the house with the external air inlet, it forces air into the room and a venturi effect kicks in when you open the hatch to add fuel... pulling smoke up the feeder and pushing it into the room.
Another (functional, but not very sensible) solution is to split your RMH between two rooms. Have the feeder in a non-tightly-sealed room (e.g. a mud room) then have the burn chamber pass through a wall and have the rest of the RMH (riser and thermal mass) be located in an adjacent room. This solves all of the pressure issues caused by a tight seal, but it makes operation of the RMH more complex. Normally you place the feeder somewhere that is convenient and which you pass by frequently — so you can just glance in and top up as and when required. If you put the feeder into another room you need to make dedicated trips into a different (and usually much colder) room.
